Last Day of School

I woke up with a sense of dread. The same feeling I had endured as a long-term substitute at Mark Twain Middle School. Feelings of no control... chaos... the kids rude and disrespectful. But that was then. This was now, today, a culmination of three weeks of good teaching, good classroom management, good learning and good kids.

I studied the Course in Miracles the way I always do first thing in the morning. It told me to accept the love and help that is coming to me. It told me that my guilt about past causes is baseless, and I should not feel I have "something coming to me" that's punitive. Aha, I said. That's pretty deep.

So I got up, inspired, turned on the computer a little earlier than usual. Today was different indeed. You don't tell the boyfriend the link he sent you to the tarot website was like a message from God. He either pretends he doesn't care, or doesn't care, but usually telling him does not lead to deep sharing. So why bother? He probably sent it to show me neat programming....

Anyway, it said: "Five of swords. There either has been a conflict or there is about to be a conflict. Be vigilant."

That was some handy advice. I realized, here I am planning to do outdoor games with these kids; I'd better be vigilant.

So I was. I emphasized safety, set ground rules, and then we started the party. I'll tell you--it was a little wilder than I like, but we pretty much followed the schedule, improvising when needed. We cleared the tables and chairs from the center of the room so they could play musical chairs, three legged race, hot potato, red light green light, limbo, and have a dance contest. They ate food, talked, enjoyed music. Sure they yelled a few times when someone was cheating. And yes, the boys were boys, there was some horseplay. However, at the end of the 2nd period, when the bell rang, this group of kids from all over the world lingered, exchanged phone numbers, hugged each other, and thanked me. Yeah, it was good.